Funny Cat Name Generator

Funny cat names work because cats take themselves so seriously. The joke lands hardest when the name undercuts the animal: a nine-pound void named Gerald, a kitten who knocks glasses off tables named Sir Knocks-Things-Over, or a sleek Siamese answering to Meatball. Most funny names fall into a few families, and this generator covers all of them: celebrity and historical puns (Chairman Meow, Fuzz Aldrin, Catrick Swayze, Purrnest Hemingway, Cleocatra), aggressively ordinary human names (Kevin, Linda, Dennis, Phyllis), food names (Tater Tot, Pierogi, Cheeto, Lasagna), pompous titles (Baron von Floof, Admiral Nibbles, Professor Snugglepants) and ironic names that describe the opposite of the cat (Tiny, Killer, Absolute Unit).

The human-name trend is the funniest right now: shelters and vets report a wave of cats called Steve, Carl, Barbara and Doug, because saying "Barbara, get off the counter" never stops being entertaining. Puns are best kept to two or three syllables of punchline, since Leonardo DiCatprio is brilliant once and a mouthful at the vet, where the receptionist will have to read it out.

Say the name at full volume in front of a window before you commit. If you'd be embarrassed to shout it across the garden at 6am, pick the next one.